Alice's Small Problem
by Niphuria
Summary: Tarrant decides to get even with Thackery for his earlier "Button Problem" but Alice turns out to be the recipient of his payback scheme.    WARNING - this is pretty silly and probably extremely inappropriate. But when has that ever stopped me?


I don't own Alice in Wonderland or any of its characters. Based on the 2010 Tim Burton film.

Rated M for explicit adult content.

Tarrant decides to get even with Thackery for his earlier "Button Problem" but Alice turns out to be the recipient of his payback scheme.

**Alice's Small Problem**

Finally! He was going to be able to get even with Thackery for causing his recent rectal episode dubbed by his closest friends as the"Button Problem." Tarrant giggled madly as he drew the vial from his voluminous purple pocket. Pishalver wasn't easy to come by, but Mirana always had some on hand. When Tarrant asked her for some she hadn't even asked him why; she had simply handed him several vials and warned him to give them to Alice for safe keeping.

Alice, indeed! He didn't always need to give everything magical or fragile to Alice! Besides, he just needed a partial bottle for this, anyway. Just a bit in the Hare's tea and he'd be tiny until Mirana returned from her latest sojourns for shopping for the finest and whitest flowers and other assorted plants. Of course she gave consideration to silvers, but she was, of course, partial to white. The whiter the better. And if there were furry flowers and plants, she would snatch those up at once! She always enjoyed her trips to various towns which specialized in gardening and who knew when she would return? Thankfully she had left Absolem in charge at the Palace and the curmudgeonly butterfly had agreed.

Alice came out of the house and began to help Tarrant set up the Table for afternoon tea. "Tarrant, why are you talking to yourself and giggling?"

"I...I am?" Oh, dear, he had been! But she hadn't heard what he was saying, which he thought he was just thinking, anyway, so it wasn't all bad. "Oh, nothing much, sweetling. You know how I always enjoy my tea and the exquisite ritual beforehand!"

"So, what's the flavour today?" she asked as they both finished setting the Table.

"Mint," Tarrant replied.

"Delicious!" Alice exclaimed. "We haven't had mint for quite some time." She sighed in contentment and went to Tarrant, who happily leaned down so she could kiss his cheek. "Did I ever tell you that Father's favourite teas were mint and Earl Grey?"

Tarrant raised his orange brows. "Really? Well, sweetling, I'll see to it that we have those more often, hey?"

Alice smiled and her blue eyes flashed with specks of violet.

Tarrant was taken aback. "Sweetling? Your eyes just showed violet!"

"Did they, now?" she asked, pausing to think. "Since I've come back here to you, they've shown silver when we're...um...passionate, and now violet when I'm feeling sentimental? It seems that I'm becoming sort of like you. I like it," she finished, and put her arm around Tarrant's waist.

"You...you do?" She wanted to be more like him? Why, he was flattered! Actually, he was more than flattered, he was delighted! His Alice was please to be like him! Mirana had told them that her recent silver streaks and specks were her own Gift from Underland. Those Gifts, she had explained, often manifested in a way as to reflect the desire of the recipient to be closer to something very Cherished. And his Alice cherished him so much that her eyes were becoming changeable like his!

"Of course, silly! I absolutely adore your eyes! And to be able to share that trait with you makes me feel even closer to you. Oh, we'll be late! Tarrant, pour the tea and I'll go and fetch Thackery and Mally!"

Alice rushed off to find the pair of friends and Tarrant filled the three teacups and Mally's special tea thimble. Then, looking quickly around to make sure he was alone, Tarrant emptied some of the Pishalver into Thackery's tea cup. He then hurried inside to get the plate of chocolate chip muffins that Alice had baked.

The moment Tarrant went back inside the house Thackery appeared with his plate of scones and set them on the table. He glared at his cup of tea. Too full! He hated cups that were too full! Shrugging, he changed cups with Alice and sat down. Mally scampered up behind him and climbed atop the table and Alice was just behind them.

Tarrant returned with the muffins and the friends began their usual morning banter and bad joke telling.

Then Alice sipped her tea.

"I can't believe you! You thought Pishalverwould be funny? Well, I'll show you funny, Mr. Hightopp!" Alice screeched, holding tightly to Tarrant's handkerchief wrapped around her now approximately eight inch tall form. She moved forward on the table and slapped him, as any indignant Victorian lady would.

"Ouch!" Tarrant squealed. That stung! Well, a tiny bit. She was only inches tall and knew it. She would never have done that if she'd be able to really hurt him. His now tiny and furiously blushing, and just plain furious, Alice, stomped her foot. Oh, he saw, she had acquired a new eye colour; blue flecked with orange. Not good...

"I know I deserve that, sweetling, but how was I to know that Thackery would switch your tea cups? Listen to me, please, Alice! I'll do anything to make this up to you! Just try me! New dress? New hat? Do you want an extra room added on to the house for all the new things I will make you? Do you want jewelry? Books? Tiny clothes? Do you..."

"Tarrant!" she shouted. He silenced and even clapped his hand over his mouth to be certain that he wouldn't begin rambling again.

Alice took a deep breath. "All right. I know you didn't mean it. I know it was an accident. And I suppose I won't make your life a living hell until Mirana returns. But what am I supposed to do? I'm so...small! How am I going to get along for several days, or perhaps even a week?"

Tarrant released his mouth. "Well, I don't know. What I do know is that we must continue to have Teas, but I promise you that I'll try to make you as comfortable as I can during this..." And then he lost his composure. He began to chuckle; then giggle. And then he burst into such gales of laughter that Alice stomped her foot in fury. But then even she began to see the humour in the situation and laughed along with him. After all, there was nothing for it. They may as well make the best of it.

Tarrant was pleased to see her eyes return to their usual cornflower blue.

Alice should not have been surprised at the speed at which her Hatter made her several new dresses and slippers for her tiny form. But she noticed that he had failed to make her undergarments. She shrugged. Well, it _would_ be difficult to make such tiny pantalettes, she supposed. Then she paused in her thinking. To be bare-bottomed? That was not only highly improper but it was...breezy. She felt every draft and breeze that flowed through the house and outside.

Oh, outside. Did she dare leave the house being so small? She remembered the last time she was tiny; she had a magical undergarment set from the Room of Doors. But now she did not. The grass would poke her in unmentionable places!

She heard water running and ran to the Bathing Chamber. Tarrant was stepping into their favourite tub while the water was filling. He saw her enter and smiled.

"Sweetling! What a pleasant surprise!"

"Tarrant! Why didn't you make me any pantalettes?"

"I'm sorry, Alice. I will make you some, but can they wait until morning? Right now I need to take a bath and ease my aching muscles." Then he grinned and waggled his brows at her. "Care to join me?"

Alice couldn't help but blush. It did sound fun, however! She giggled and stripped off her dress, kicked off her slippers and ran to the tub. Tarrant gently lifted her and carefully sat down in the slowly filling tub.

"Hmmm...should you sit on my...ah...where would you like to sit, sweetling?"

Alice pondered. "Well, why don't I lay back against your chest?"

Tarrant grinned and lay her gently against his chest. Alice felt odd laying completely naked against him like this. Her entire body could feel him from head to toes and it felt so strange. Yet it was pleasant. Not that she wanted to stay tiny, but for now she could be content. She sighed and relaxed as she breathed in the cherry-blossom scent that Tarrant had added to the water. Slowly the water rose until it covered her to her waist and then he turned it off.

Tarrant, for his part, was not quite so content. He knew it was Bad of him, Slurvish of him, but looking down at his naked little Alice was beginning to...

"Tarrant!" Alice cried out, scandalized, "you find this..." She stopped. Then she giggled. "You find this arousing?" However, one look at the lavender-purple erection rising from the water confirmed her observation.

Tarrant groaned. "Ah can nae help it, lass! Yer sew luvly an' perfec an' bein' sew smawl din nae affect mah...lust," he concluded guiltily.

Alice giggled again and reached for his hand. He gently let her guide it to her body. She took his index finger and dipped it in the water and then dragged it gently between her breasts. Tarrant gasped in pleasure and Alice repeated the motion. Then she felt extremely naughty and turned herself and climbed toward his face. Tarrant barely breathed as she pressed her lips to his. It was so very strange to be able to kiss one lip on one small spot with her own! She licked his bottom lip and he groaned. Well, he was finding her very sexy indeed, despite her small stature!

Alice was grateful that she was no smaller than she had been the last time. She had no fear that any accident would befall her with Tarrant or in this tub. She slid her tongue across his bottom lip and when he groaned again she smiled and slid down his chest until she landed gently against his erection. She was partially submerged. Happy with her kiss from her beloved she lay back against him.

Tarrant's eyelids fluttered and his green-gold eyes were flecking with white. Lust. Raw lust.

"Tarrant, we can't! I can kiss you and touch you, but we can't do any more than that! I'm sorry."

He sighed and continued to study her with that lustful gaze of his that began to make Alice grow moist between her thighs; and not because of the water. Oh, no! She was supposed to be the adult here, not a sex-crazed...

Tarrant lifted her gently and brought her face to his. "Kiss meh agin, mah sweet," he said huskily. Alice hesitated and he added, "please?" She couldn't resist him. She kissed his bottom lip and then licked it again until he was groaning. She stood on the palm of one hand and he cradled her carefully with his other. When he parted his lips slightly and poked out just the tip of his tongue, Alice giggled and ran her tiny one along his.

Tarrant giggled for a moment, too, for her tiny tongue tickled him! Then he stopped the kiss and smiled at her. He had a better use for his hands now. He raised his knees and pressed them together. He lay Alice back against them. The tip of his erection was now against her tiny backside but he wasn't overly affected just yet. As Alice looked at him and waited he took his index finger and began to trace her body with it; from her hair to her toes and back up again. When Alice gasped and flushed he used his finger to tease her breasts. The best part was that she was real and not a doll! His Alice was real and her flesh was soft and supple and very sensitive. His fingertip brushed over her nipples until they were pebble-hard despite the heat of the water.

Alice arched her back in pleasure. Then she reached behind her and used her small hands to tease the head of his cock.

Tarrant gasped. "Alice! Yer a naughty lass, ye are!"

She smirked. "What are you going to do about it?"

Tarrant gave her a wicked smile and she shot him an apprehensive glance. "Tarrant? What are you thinking?"

He kept up that wicked smile and picked her up again. "Lassie, spread 'em!"

Alice blushed more furiously than before. "I beg your pardon?"

Tarrant grinned. "Ah sae spread 'em!" Alice gasped indignantly but he could see that by now he had corrupted her thoughts thoroughly enough that she would oblige him. And she did, putting on a show of reluctance that he easily saw through.

He picked her up once again and she spread her legs for him. She knew what he had in mind and a part of her was shocked and scandalized, but the other part of her, the larger part of her, wanted exactly what he did! He lay her on her back on his palms and brought her to his mouth. As soon as Alice saw his tongue she instantly grew even more moist. She knew just how long and talented that tongue was!

He slid it between her thighs and she nearly screamed with the sensation! Oh, it was wonderful normally, but she had never felt anything like this, nor ever expected to!

His tongue covered her sex completely and easily and it stimulated her in every spot! Her inner lips, her slit, her tiny nub; all of it! Tarrant skillfully manipulated her by using it flat upon her, and then pointed. Quickly, and then so slowly that she gripped his fingers and begged him for release.

As for Tarrant, this was certainly a novelty! Oh, he could taste her and tease her and that delighted him beyond measure! But he could also see her much better than at any other time and her delicious squirming and wriggling and those breathy little gasps and pants nearly undid his control.

"Please, Tarrant!" she begged. "Please!"

So he gave her release. She climaxed beautifully but he didn't withdraw his tongue quite yet. He teased it over her breasts and in between them until she was so exhausted she could squirm no longer and lay in an exhausted heap in his palms.

Tarrant smiled in satisfaction and lay her back against his chest so she could rest. He watched her tiny bosom heave rapidly and he had another Bad thought. He wondered if she would... No. She was too tired. That was all right. Perhaps tomorrow.

However, Alice was thinking along the same lines he was. He needed relief, too. She knew she couldn't do what she normally could for him, but she could tease him a bit on the outside. She smiled. That would certainly appeal to him, she was sure of it!

Alice had caught her breath and she sat up and then climbed down to his erection. It was mostly under water.

"Tarrant, raise yourself a bit!"

She was really going to? He could scarce believe it! He happily obliged her, dirty-minded hatter that he was. But he didn't regret it one bit. Dirty-minded hatters had more fun!

Alice embraced his cock with her body and hugged it tightly to her. Tarrant sighed in pleasure. But then Alice began to stroke her hands up and down the shaft as she used her tiny tongue to tease the head. He groaned and began to tremble. She was satisfied at how well her efforts were being received.

Next she laved away the drop of seed at the tip and he shuddered hard.

Alice slid her body up and down his shaft and then returned to the top. She used her tongue to its best advantage this time and teased the ultra-sensitive flesh just beneath the head. Tarrant's body jerked and he gasped loudly.

"Ah...ah-hah...ahhh...lassie, yer...ahhh..."

Alice knew he was very, very close so she decided to show him mercy. She continued to tease that sweet spot and then she ran her hands along the top and this time Tarrant shuddered violently and he came so powerfully that Alice felt the spasms in his cock as his seed spilled over the top and covered her arms.

"Ah, lassie...ye waur incredible!" Tarrant panted. He smiled down at her and she grinned.

"I know, and so were you!" she said teasingly and lovingly. "But I think I need to wash!"

"Och, yer righ'!" Tarrant held her carefully and parted his knees and lowered her into the water so she could wash.

This was certainly a bath neither would ever forget.

The next several days were not so bad. Tarrant kept an eye on her at all times to be sure she was safe. He was always careful when he lifted her to the Table and let her use his best thimble as a tea cup. He made sure to keep her entertained by reading to her and letting her watch him work and even help with the simpler tasks in his Workroom.

Tarrant always took her outside for moonlit strolls and she rode on his shoulder as she was slightly too big to ride by hat, but she didn't mind. She enjoyed whispering into his ear and saying things that made him blush. And when she nipped his ear or licked it she knew she was in for a treat later at home!

Sometimes they would be a bit naughty in bed or in the bath, and other times they would simply cuddle. Either way they lived contentedly enough. Alice made the best of her situation and Tarrant was so attentive that she never would have thought that being tiny for five days would be anything less than horrible.

However, the day they heard that Mirana was back they were on their way to the Castle.

Mirana was in hysterics. She laughed so much that her jaws were aching by the time she collected herself. Alice huffed a bit and tried to bring her predicament back to a serious tone.

"Mirana, please! I need to be my own size again!"

"Oh, yes, of course!" She got to work at once.

Alice cringed when instead of Upelchekin Mirana made her the forumla that she finished off by spitting in it.

Ah well, beggars cannot be choosers, she supposed. She downed the vile stuff and was soon herself again.

The following day Alice served cherry tarts, Tarrant served the tea, and Thackery brought the scones, as usual.

"So, how do you feel, sweetling, now that you are your proper Alice size again?" Tarrant asked her as he seated her and then himself.

"Oh, Tarrant, it's just wonderful! I never knew that just being my proper size would feel so marvelous! I'll never take it for granted again, I assure you!"

Thackery began to cackle and threw a scone at Tarrant. Tarrant easily dodged the missile and sipped his strawberry tea.

And shrank.

Everyone gaped except Thackery. "Ha ha! Tarrant the Hatter tried to play joke on Thackery! But the joke's on him now! Hee hee hee!"

Alice bent down to see Tarrant scowling and wrapping his ascot around himself.

"Sweetling, please, take me to Mirana?"

Alice doubled over in helpless laughter. "Of...of course, Tarrant!" she gasped when she caught her breath.

"But not until after tea!" he added imperiously. "We must have tea first!"

Alice dissolved into laughter all over again.

This may be one of the silliest things I've ever done; I don't know. But I decided to try HarryMasonFan's and Chrismata's suggestion to try a Tiny Alice story. I hope you two like it!

Any and all comments are welcome.


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